feedback

Why so hostile?

Maximum Z antagonist, characters, criticism, encouragement, feedback, loglines, networking, producer, protagonist, public forums, screenwriting, script, self-confidence, social media, synopsis, westerns, writing ,
Angry voice!
Angry voice!

I’ve been making an effort over the past few weeks to build my network of writing acquaintances, which has involved connecting on assorted social media networks.

Several of these include groups of like-minded people that offer up the opportunity to ask questions, get feedback, etc.

One of them was about loglines.

Feeling fairly confident but open to suggestions about the one for my western, I typed it in, hoping somebody might have some helpful comments.

Within minutes, the response came in: “…or? What’s at stake? What are the consequences?”

Hmm. Well, her train’s been stolen, which…puts her livelihood at stake?  And it’s going to be used in a major heist, so the consequences are…widespread? I’ve always hated this part. Maybe I’m not giving enough information?

I wrote back: “open to suggestions.”

Past experience with logline feedback via online forums, while occasionally frustrating, has sometimes yielded positive results.

Sometimes.

A few minutes later: “I’m a producer and script consultant, not a psychic. If I knew what the story was about, knew the protagonist’s motives, knew what the antagonist was doing and why, and knew what was at stake and the consequences of certain actions, I would make a suggestion. However, with so little on offer, there’s little I can do other repeat what I’ve already said.”

I’m not arguing anything after the word ‘psychic’. It’s not easy to get all of that across in a logline. It’s much harder than most writers realize.

(Side note – I love it when somebody backs up their comments with the proclamation of their qualifications. As expected, a quick internet search of this person’s “producer and script consultant” credentials yielded both jack and squat. It took a lot of effort to not ask them for more details.)

Desperately seeking resolution, I offered: “Would you be willing to take a look at the 1-page synopsis to get a better understanding of the story?”

Soon afterward: “based on your logline, no”

And that was that.

While I didn’t have a problem with the actual advice, there just seemed to be this overall tone of angry condescension in their text. “Grr! I know what I’m talking about! My advice is infallible and you’re an idiot if you don’t listen to me! Grr! Argh!” Maybe I was just reading too much into it?

Honestly, it kind of nagged at me for the rest of the day. I always thought the point of these groups was to help each other. Sure, sometimes people just don’t get it, but I’m more likely to appreciate your comments if you seem willing/interested in actually helping me.

Later in the day, somebody with no connection to me whatsoever called this person out for being unnecessarily cruel (a bit harsh, but I understood where they were coming from). I made a point of staying totally out of what soon became a snippy back-and-forth of “I’m right, you’re wrong”.

So much for taking part in that group again.

Still seeking some kind of help, I tried again on a different forum, but approached it from a different angle.

I listed the logline plus some key story details that might help, adding how I was seeking some bolstering in terms of including stakes and consequences. (The original responder may have come across as an asshole, but I didn’t think their advice was wrong.)

There was a significant difference in the responses. A lot were not only helpful, but practical and encouraging, including this gem – “I love this logline. If I were a producer I’d want to read it. Hell, I still want to read it, just because it sounds like fun.”

I felt a little better, had what I felt was a stronger logline, and a few requests to read the script. Nice.

As part of that aforementioned back-and-forth, my original responder said they were just preparing new writers for the kinds of responses they should expect from the industry if they submit “subpar material”.

While I can understand that kind of thinking, it seems that people are more likely to heed your advice or suggestions if you actually come across as helpful, rather than sound like we’re wasting your time and the last thing you want to deal with right now.

But then again, I’m just a nice guy to begin with, so what do I know?

Doth it suck? Yea, verily

Maximum Z adventure, criticism, encouragement, feedback, goals, monsters, networking, opportunity, outlines, productivity, rewrite, scenes, screenwriting, script, sequence, Shakespeare, spec, story, storytelling, writing
Because "Dude. Yorick. Bummer." just doesn't have the same panache
Because “Dude. Yorick. Bummer.” just doesn’t have the same panache

Oh, first draft. You teasing vixen.

I go over the story ideas in my head, everything coalesces and plays out like a well-oiled machine.

But try to transfer them onto the page, and it all discombobulates into a tangled mess on par with the cord on a pair of earbuds carelessly tossed into a gym bag.

Experienced writers know what I mean.

Although it took a while, I finally reached the end of Act Two in the revamping of the outline of the pulpy adventure spec. On one hand, I’m thrilled to have gotten here. On the other, I want to shrug my shoulders and mutter “eh, good enough” about the scenes and sequences that led up to this point.

They’re definitely far from perfect, and without a doubt will be totally different as future drafts come into play.

Let’s pause to consider the phrase “future drafts.” As in “there will be more”, emphasis on “will”. Not “might”. “Will”.

I recently connected with another writer on a networking site, and they ended our introductory correspondence by letting me know they had first drafts of their scripts available to read.

I sincerely hope not.

Unless you’re looking for feedback, don’t show your first draft to anyone. Ever.

The first draft is the attempt to put all your ideas into some kind of order. Know going in that it won’t be pretty, and will most likely be a big mess requiring a ton of fixes. Not a bunch of little edits, but huge, drastic steps. The end result should look totally different from what you started with.

Don’t regard rewriting as a chore or a slog. It’s something you have to do on a regular basis. It makes the script better and helps you become a better writer.

Consider the last script you wrote. How many drafts did it require to get to the point where you finally said it was done? And wasn’t each successive draft a little better, until the final draft turned out significantly improved compared to the very first one?

That’s what you should be going for. Every single time.

Roll up for the My Writing Process Tour!

Maximum Z action, adventure, analysis, Back to the Future, Beatles, blog, characters, creativity, Done Deal Pro, feedback, genre, ideas, inciting incident, Indiana Jones, mystery, Nicholl Fellowship, originality, outlines, plot, plot points, Raiders of the Lost Ark, representation, rewrite, screenwriting, script, setup, spec, Star Wars, story, storytelling, structure, subplot, theme, tropes, westerns, writing
Sorry, no walruses involved
Step right this way! Sorry, no walruses involved

I’ve been invited to take part in The My Writing Process Tour, which is kind of a blog/chain letter thing. One blogger asks another to take part and answer some insightful questions, then link to writers/bloggers we’d recommend.

I was nominated by Henry Sheppard, aka Adelaide Screenwriter, from the Australian metropolis of Adelaide. He’s always offering up some fantastic material, including articles, interviews and shorts. Definitely worth checking out.

As for me…

1. What am I working on?

Three items currently hold my attention: revamping the outline of a pulpy adventure spec, the rewrite/polish of a Christmas-themed mystery-comedy and resuming the hunt for representation.

2. How does my work differ from all others of its genre?

Even though I’ve written in several genres, the one thing I always try to convey is a sense of fun and excitement. It takes a lot more effort than people realize to really engage a reader that way.

I want you to enjoy the story beyond just “this is good writing” and more like that amusement park thrill ride you rush to get back in line for as soon you get off.

3. Why do I write what I do?

My formative years were the late 70s/early 80s, so I had the benefit of being heavily influenced by the likes of STAR WARS, RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK and BACK TO THE FUTURE. To me, those are textbook examples of what smart storytelling should be, and it’s what I strive for in my own work.

I’ve stated before about being a fan of the genres I write, so not only am I trying to write something I’d want to see, but I try to create something I haven’t seen before.

4. How does your writing process work?

It all starts with an idea. Is there a story behind it? If so, what happens over the course of that story? How could I tell it in an original way?

Once I have a general idea about that story, including knowing how it starts and ends, I set up the plot points (statement of theme on page 3, inciting incident on page 10, etc), then fill in the gaps between them.

If it’s a genre-specific film, I try to incorporate elements that are part of that genre while trying to avoid tropes, or at least approach them from a different perspective.

I do a majority of my work in developing the outline, and it makes a huge difference. It gives me a better overview of the whole thing so it’s easier to keep track of character development, storylines, subplots, setups and payoffs. I won’t even consider starting on pages until I think the outline is solid.

Because of my schedule, I write when I can. When it comes to pages, I try to produce at least 3 a day. Sometimes it’s more. It’s gets easier the more you do it. They add up fast, and before you know it, you’ve got a completed draft to go back, edit and rewrite.

I’m also extremely fortunate to have several friends and trusted colleagues I can turn to for feedback. They pull no punches in telling me if something doesn’t work.

Lastly, I’ll rewrite and polish the script until I think it’s good to go.

Over there on your right is a list of blogs I think make for some excellent reading and advice. I’ve added three definitely worth checking out:

–The Single Screenwriter by Christie LeBlanc

–Writer of Fine Things by Evan Porter

–The Screenwriting Process from James (don’t know his last name) in the UK

Bonus! If you’re looking for some reasonably-priced professional analysis for your script, you might want to consider:

-Doug Davidson’s Four Star Feedback. Doug is the only writer to win a Nicholl Fellowship with an animation script (2004), but he happily covers all genres.

-Andrew Hilton aka the Screenplay Mechanic. His services have garnered extremely high praise on the Done Deal Pro forums.

Thanks for reading!

Flying solo

Maximum Z anxiety, confidence, contest, determination, feedback, query letter, representation, rewrite, screenwriting, script, spec, storytelling, stress, writing
Wild blue yonder, here I come
Wild blue yonder, here I come

I’ve been hesitant to say anything, but there’s just no getting around it anymore.

My manager and I have parted ways.

Long story short – things weren’t happening.  Apart from being disappointed it didn’t work out, I bear him no ill will, and wish him and his savvy assistant all the best.

So once again, it’s all me.  Gone is the initial fear/terror of no longer having representation. Actually, the nervousness has segued into one of…let’s call it liberation.

I can’t say I’m all the way back to square one, because this isn’t totally starting from scratch.  This go-round includes a much better understanding of what I have to do and how to do it, such as:

-being able to offer up one script that’s had some moderate success in some high-profile contests, and one that’s “a refreshingly exciting new take on an old genre.” Throw in the two others currently being developed, and I’ve got quite an arsenal of high-concept material at my disposal.

-knowing the right way to do a query letter. Lessons have been learned from mistakes made the last time, and the first wave has been dispatched. There’s even been a couple of “We’d like to read this” responses.  I send the script and don’t look back.

-having a lot more confidence in my writing. All the writing, rewriting and utilizing of notes and feedback has had a significant positive impact. I may not be the absolute best ever, but I definitely know how to spin a ripping yarn you want to keep reading.

Thus the quest resumes. Wish me luck.

Let’s keep things simple, shall we?

Maximum Z continuity, editing, feedback, goals, monsters, outlines, payoff, Pirates of the Caribbean, plot, rewrite, Rossio & Elliott, scenes, screenwriting, script, setup, spec, story, storytelling, structure, writing
This series was anything but easy to follow
Talk about confusing. This series was anything but easy to follow

A nice writing sprint for the monster spec outline resulted in getting to the page 45 plot point, which was great. But what it made it especially satisfying was realizing how to get there in the equivalent of a short, straight line.

No overly complicated story details. No sudden heading off in a totally different direction. Just THIS leading right into THAT, doing exactly what was intended.

One of the most important parts of presenting a story is that everything you need to know has been properly set up, and that it all flows smoothly from one scene to the next.

While you’re still in the plotting-everything-out stage, ask yourself “Is this easy to follow?” A lot of writers will defend their material as such, but that doesn’t necessarily mean it is.

This thing is practically a part of you. You’ve labored over it for what feels like forever, and you know the story inside and out.

We don’t, which means there’s a good chance someone reading it for the first time might not pick up on everything, which isn’t our fault.

Maybe you’ve thrown too much information at us, or just have too much going on that it’s hard to keep track of everything.

It happens, but it’s not the crisis you think it is. Don’t see it as laboring your way through yet another rewrite; it’s actually another chance to make your script better.

Think streamlined.

Strive to avoid unwanted bloat and confusion by constantly checking and re-checking that your story elements make sense, fit where they should and play an important part in telling the story.