Star Wars

X + Y = you(r script)

Maximum Z Pirates of the Caribbean, pitching, screenwriting, script, Star Wars, story, The Last Starfighter, Tracking Board, writing , , ,
Two individual great things combine to make a new great thing
Two individual great things combine to make a new great thing

Scenario time! You find yourself in the mythical elevator with the even more mythical open-minded Hollywood exec. Their attention is all yours for the next 30 seconds. Your moment to shine is at hand!

You give ’em your honed-to-perfection logline. They react with raised eyebrows, a slight tilt of the head and an intrigued “Hmm.” The fish is nibbling at that hook, but the deal ain’t sealed yet.

“How would you pitch that?” they ask. “What’s your X meets Y?”

In other words, what two movies does your script incorporate elements from while telling a unique and original story?

I’ve read arguments both for and against doing this. Personally, I don’t have anything against doing it, but usually try to avoid it, preferring to let the logline do the selling.

But sometimes you’re going to need those two points of reference to offer up a stronger idea of what somebody can expect from your story.

It’s also important to name films that are well-known, successful or both. Avoid box office flops and the obscure at all costs! There’s also the question of timeliness, but I’ll get into that in a second.

Case in point: The folks at the Tracking Board Launchpad gave each semifinalist script it’s own landing page, featuring a thumbnail sketch of details (logline, genre, contact info, etc.)

Part of what they wanted from the writers was their “X meets Y” pitch.

Since I couldn’t go with the phrase that served as my mantra during the writing process (retro sci-fi steampunk pirates), I thought “PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN meets STAR WARS” summed it up nicely.

The response was that this was just “okay”, but the story didn’t seem as reminiscent of STAR WARS. Maybe there was another film that was more similar?

Fortunately for me, K was right there next to me during this exchange and suggested “How about ‘PIRATES meets THE LAST STARFIGHTER?'”

Yeah, that works. Definitely a stronger connection with my script on several levels.

Maybe my only nit to pick is that it’s not the most recent of films. 1984, to be precise. Almost 30 years old(!). But it’s still pretty well-known and is usually mentioned as part of “they don’t make ’em like that anymore”, so 2 points in my favor. If you’ve never seen it, you should really make a point to do so.

(And just to put it in perspective, STAR WARS is over 35 years old, but is probably a little more in the public eye.)

So take a look at your script. Put some thought into what best makes up your “X meets Y”.

That way, the next time someone asks “How would you pitch that?”, you’re ready to go.

Because ‘Journal of the Whills’ just doesn’t cut it*

Maximum Z creativity, screenwriting, Star Wars, title, writing
How DOES it look on a marquee?
How DOES it look on a marquee?

*the original title George Lucas had for STAR WARS. Not as good, right?

After reading countless spec titles in places such as The Black List and Done Deal Pro, I’ve come to the conclusion that my script really needs to undergo a name change.

DREAMSHIP

It sort of just…sits there, when instead it should be grabbing your attention and making you think, “Cool! I’ve gotta see this!”

Examples: BACK TO THE FUTURE. CHINATOWN. DIE HARD. See what I mean? Solid. Succinct. To the point.

I may go back to the original title – THE AMAZING DREAMSHIP ADVENTURE. It feels like it does a better job of conveying what the story’s about and what kind of ride you’re in for, but I wouldn’t put it past me to try and tweak it a little more.

It was also suggested that since this is more of a family-oriented kind of story, I should go the HARRY POTTER route and include the main character’s name. I’m not sure how I feel about that.

Having a good, strong title is key because it and the logline create the first impression. Do an effective job with that and you’ve got their attention. Just make sure the script/story can hold onto it.

Ambition, expectations and that sort of thing

Maximum Z Back to the Future, Raiders of the Lost Ark, screenwriting, Star Wars, story
Great satisfaction comes from checking off each item

I want to write the next STAR WARS.

By which I mean I want to write an entertaining epic that appeals to all ages and results in an appreciation that lasts much longer than anyone anticipated. 35 years later and still going strong? Incredible!

I want to write the next RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK.

By which I mean I want to write a thrilling adventure that grabs you from the start, never lets go and takes you on the cinematic equivalent of the most intense roller coaster ride ever.

I want to write the next BACK TO THE FUTURE.

By which I mean I want to write a smart comedy that deftly handles one of the most complicated subjects out there, has a perfectly bulletproof script and is a textbook example of setup and payoff.

What else do these films have in common?  Sure, each was a box office smash. That would be nice too. High-quality sequels? Also a plus. But it all comes down to an original story that really entertains. Something the movie-going public hasn’t seen before and will remember long after they leave the theatre.

Difficult? Sure.

Impossible? Not necessarily.

Worth pursuing? Absolutely.

Getting left and right brain to work together

Maximum Z analysis, Attack the Block, Movie of the Moment, movies, rewrite, scenes, screenwriting, Shawna Benson, Star Wars, story, The Avengers, The Muppets
Image
It’s like they’re looking inside my head!

I have a deadline in place. I’m striving towards being completely done with the edit/polish by the end of the month, so I work on it when I can.  A scene or two here, a few pages there.  It’s coming together.

A key part of this is making sure each scene does what it’s supposed to and fits where it’s supposed to. A member of my old writing group used to say, “Each scene should advance the plot, the theme and the character.” A reliable chestnut, indeed.

It’s also been a good exercise to look at the components of each scene and figure out if there’s a way to do it more effectively. Do I need a stronger verb? Can the character say this in one sentence, rather than two? Does it fit within the framework of the story? (I’ve written before about the economy of the scenes in STAR WARS. Lucas was able to say a lot with a minimal amount of words. I need to work on that.)

We watched ATTACK THE BLOCK over the weekend (an unexpected absolute blast – smart and original, but watch it with subtitles on). One thing that really stuck with me were the character arcs, especially for the leads. This was done in a very subtle, non-in-your-face way. Very impressive.  This reminded me that I need to make sure this happens with my characters as well.

-Another great interview on The Script Adventurer! yesterday. Talked with writer Shawna Benson about her background, as well as some of her current exploits. Really interesting stuff. The show will play again here Sunday at 7pm PST.  Don’t mind the occasional technical difficulties.

-Apart from ATTACK THE BLOCK, other Movies of the Moment include: THE AVENGERS. Wow. The closest we’ve come to a live-action comic book. Further proof that Joss Whedon can do no wrong. We saw it as a family at a small 2-screen neighborhood theatre. Perfect setting. Everybody liked it, even to the point I may even seek it out on DVD.

The other movie was THE MUPPETS. It was okay, but a little disappointing. It felt like they were relying on the nostalgia factor almost as much as the script. Too many jokes were aimed squarely at adults (a reference to the TV show BENSON? Really?), which didn’t help. V watched it with a friend, and both seemed bored.  Apparently there’s a sequel in the works. Hopefully they can get back on track.

One happy fanboy

Maximum Z post-production, Skywalker Ranch, sound, Star Wars

There was no work done on the rewrite at all yesterday because I got to do something I honestly never I thought I’d get to: visit Skywalker Ranch.

If the name sounds unfamiliar, it’s the compound in Marin County (the one north of San Francisco) where George Lucas had set up Industrial Light & Magic after the success of STAR WARS.  ILM has since moved to the Presidio in SF, but Skywalker Sound and a lot of the administrative offices are still there.

A mom of another student at V’s school works at Skywalker Sound.  In fact, she won an Oscar earlier this year for Best Sound Editing for INCEPTION (her and two other guys).  One of the silent auction prizes at our school’s spring fundraiser was a private tour of the grounds.  Since there was no way we could afford that (I think it went for something like $275), I ran into her about six weeks ago at a school function.  I casually mentioned missing out on the opportunity to take part in the tour, to which she said she’d see if she could arrange something.

A few weeks later, I got an email saying that if we could be there during her lunch hour, she’d be happy to show us around.  Deal.

Our dilemma now was whether or not to bring V, because that would mean taking her out of school early.  My first reaction was it would be worth it, but the more we discussed it, we decided that this wasn’t an amusement park-type environment, but more an actual production facility, which your typical 8-year-old would probably find boring.

But I had heard they had a gift shop, so we’d get her something.

The Ranch is way out there on Lucas Valley Road, and it’s quite easy to drive right past it if you’re not looking for it. No signage; no big-ass Star Wars logo anywhere.  Just a nondescript driveway off a quiet country road.

You get through the gate and up to the security guard booth.  While the guard was contacting our friend, I couldn’t help but notice the EMT-type patch at the top of her sleeve.  Like a fire department logo, except with an X-Wing Fighter in the middle.  Cool.

We got our map and directions where to go, then drove ahead.

My first reaction was “It’s a lot smaller than I expected.”  And it is.  It’s not the sprawling estate I thought it would be.  Everything was a lot closer than the map indicated.

We passed the ball field, then the horse corral, the organic garden on the other side of the road, and then pulled into the Tech Building parking lot.  Our friend was waiting for us and took us inside.  The first thing you’ll notice is the abundance of movie posters for US films but in foreign languages.  They’re all over the place.

If you’re into sound or audio production, you’d feel as if you’d died and gone to heaven.  There are studios of varying size throughout the whole building, each equipped with sound boards that would seem more appropriate for the Starship Enterprise.  What was also cool was that the larger ones had a theatre-like design, so each room got the maximum results for what was being worked on.  We also got to see one of the humongous rooms that they would record orchestras in, complete with adjustable walls so you can actually tune the sound of the room.

Our friend is currently working on the sound for COWBOYS & ALIENS, but she didn’t show us any footage.  The movie comes out in July, and all of the post-production will be done up until just a few weeks before the release.  We found that very strange, expecting there to be more lead time between wrapping it up and the release, but apparently that’s become common practice for most studio films these days.

Although we were only in it for a few minutes, the screening room was simply incredible. About 300 or so seats with a nice big screen.  Apparently they were setting up for some kind of demonstration later in the day, but we got to see a short snippet of a scene from RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK in black and white, but with only the dialogue sound.  No music, no effects; just “throw me the idol, I throw you the whip.”  It sounded strange to hear it like we were on the set.

Then we stopped in the Foley Room, where traditional sound effects can be created. Walking on certain types of surfaces, dropping, smashing or manipulating something to get a particular sound.  Very similar to how they did sound effects for old-time radio.

We were then asked if we wanted to see the main building, which is the one in the photo above. Very Victorian-era architecture, reminiscent of a New England beach house. In some of the cabinets just off the main door are the only proof that George Lucas is connected.  On display are some lightsaber handles (I’m fairly certain they’re the originals), the fertility idol from the opening sequence in RAIDERS, the Crystal Skull, an AT-AT model from EMPIRE, Indy’s hat and whip (also originals, I assume) and what I thought was incredibly cool – Charlie Chaplin’s cane and derby.  I’m pretty sure Lucas could afford to buy them.

Our first stop was the library, which is two floors, with a wooden spiral staircase and a gigantic stained glass window in the middle of the ceiling.  No matter what department you work in, you can come here and do research on whatever you’re working on to get the utmost in accuracy.  I asked if George’s office was in the building.  It is, but I thought it would have been presumptuous to ask if we could see if he was there.

I asked if the gift shop was here, but it was in another building.  We zipped over to another building.  The gift shop is a whole lot smaller than I expected.  We got a t-shirt for V, one of those EMT-style shirts for me (Millenium Falcon in the logo – nice!) and a pair of lightsaber chopsticks (Luke green and Darth Maul red, which also have magnets in the bottom for the complete double-bladed effect).

Our friend had to get back to work, so we thanked her and headed home.  On the drive back, K asked what I thought about what we had just done.  I said I was really glad we did it.  I also confessed that I couldn’t help but think I’d love to go back someday when they’re working on a film that I wrote.

That would be quite awesome.