screenwriting

Double, double, toil and trouble!

Maximum Z adventure, Black List, screenwriting

I didn’t get to do any work on LUCY because I was busy reading another Black List script: THE LAST WITCH HUNTER by Cory Goodman.

I admit that part of the reason I wanted to read this was because it sounds kinda-sorta like a future script of mine, the difference that mine is about a monster hunter.  And mine is more comedy-adventure, whereas this is fantasy-adventure.  With a vengeance.

The story starts 400-some years ago in Europe.  Witches are a horrific plague on mankind.  Brave warrior Kaulder seeks venegance for the death of his wife and child by leading a fearless band into a witch’s nest to kill as many witches as they can.  A thrilling battles ensues, ending with Kaulder being cursed with immortality.

Jump ahead to the present day.  Witches still exist, but are secretly part of everyday life.  They hide in plain sight.  But one witch in particular, Belial, thinks it’s once again time for witches to reign supreme over humanity.  But Kaulder, now working in conjunction with the Church, has basically become a living weapon and relentlessly seeks to stop him.

If my prose seems a little overly purple,  that should give you an idea of what Goodman’s writing is like.  He takes a sentence and wrings as much out of it as humanly possible.  Somebody doesn’t run down the stairs; they THUNDER as they CHARGE into the fray!  I bet his CAPS LOCK key really got a workout while this was being written.

Goodman also seems to subscribe to the Shane Black School of Screenwriting in that the wide margins are almost a character unto themselves, full of comments directed at the reader.  This continues throughout the whole thing.  Sometimes it works, and sometimes it gives off a “too cool for the room” kind of vibe, and becomes a little distracting.

In an effort to really create the world of this script, Goodman includes objects and artifacts relevant to the story, like Kaulder’s witch-killing gun, a certain type of knife, or a ghost warrior (comparable to Harry Potter’s Dementors).  All of these have inventive names WHICH ARE NEVER IDENTIFIED BY THE CHARACTERS.  So if you were watching this, you’d never know Kaulder’s gun is called the Purifier, because while it’s constantly mentioned in the wide margins, HE NEVER CALLS IT THAT.  You’d probably just call it his big-ass gun.

While I enjoyed reading it, it was hard to ignore the unfilmables peppered throughout, including the description of what something smelled like (!), or how ‘the camera slingshots’ around during a fight scene.  Fortunately, there weren’t a lot of moments like that, but it would still work without them.

The whole time I was reading this, I couldn’t shake the feeling that it seemed really familiar, including plot points and characters.  Then it hit me.  This is HELLBOY without the makeup.  Sure, there are a few differences here and there, but for the most part – same story.  Don’t be surprised if they to get Ron Perlman.

The script was picked up just under a year ago by Summit Entertainment with the apparent intent to start a franchise.  Timur Bekmambetov (again?) slated to produce and direct.  IMDB lists it as having a tentative 2012 release date, but that seems a little optimistic.

I shall not be deterred

Maximum Z Aint It Cool News, Lucy Steele, screenwriting, scriptshadow, Tarantino, westerns

I’ll get to today’s LUCY update in a second, but there’s something I feel compelled to address.

I read today on Aint It Cool that Tarantino has written a western.  I’m not sure how I feel about that.  My first thought was “oh crap.” I’m busting my ass to get mine done, and his will probably wrap up production by then.

But his will no doubt be talky and violent.  Mine won’t.  I’m shooting for more of a RAIDERS-type vibe.

Will this mean nobody will want to read another western?  Highly doubtful.  The Coens did TRUE GRIT. THE BRIGANDS OF RATTLEBORGE was a recent in-demand spec script that got its writer noticed.

So there’s hope for me yet.  Just got to get the damn thing finished.

Speaking of which, I went back to the old rule of “kill your darlings” today when I realized that a mini-subplot I loved developing in Act Two would have to be completely eliminated.  As much as I love it, it slows the action down and unnecessarily bulks up that particular sequence.  So out it goes.  But in the long run, it’s for the best, because it drops the number of scenes for that stretch of Act Two down to around 20, which is much more acceptable than 25 or 26.

I also discovered some notes I developed last week I had completely forgotten about, and they may solidify the subplot I started on yesterday.

Since I’m working extra hours all this week and possibly next week, getting to the end of Act Two may be pushed back until next week, which is fine.

Movie of the Moment: EASY A.  I’d heard this was a smart high school comedy.  I’d agree.

Emma Stone plays Olive, a girl who inadvertently starts a rumor that she’s lost her virginity, which is a complete lie, and as a result starts to gain the reputation of a slut.

The school sees Olive in a whole new light.  People who had ignored her in years past suddenly are paying attention to her. She embraces her new persona with relish, but doesn’t act on it, or at least in the way you’d think she would.

From there it really delves into a clever, well-written look at the power of the spoken, or rather, texted & emailed word. One subplot involves her friend, who everybody assumes is gay, which he is.  He enlists her help to spread a rumor that he’s not.  This involves providing the meant-to-mislead soundtrack to a rousing closed-door session of hot sex at a party.

While some of the characters fall into cliche territory, it was nice to see some of them have layers, or at least a little more depth to their personality than just who they’re supposed to be.

I was also surprised at Thomas Haden Church’s teacher character.  I was certain something bad was going to happen involving him.  And it did, but it was the complete opposite of what I expected.

I’m not surprised this wasn’t a bigger hit than it should have been, considering the subject matter, but it’s smart and doesn’t treat the viewer like a moron.

Which is how all movies should be.

Like my dad always says: persevere!

Maximum Z Lucy Steele, movies, Oscars, outlines, screenwriting

I didn’t get to do a lot on LUCY today, but what I was able to do got me to the equivalent of page 75.  Which is really encouraging.

The remaining quarter of Act Two and the whole of Act Three still loom, and they’re looming large.  Humongous, even.  But this has been a few-steps-at-a-time process, and will continue to be so.

Even better, not only did I find a place for the character I created a few weeks ago, but I figured out how to incorporate him into the villain’s subplot AND use him in a way that it helps move Lucy’s storyline forward as well.

It looks like there may be a few kinks here and there to straighten out, but everything’s starting to tie together.  Which is what I’ve been working towards since Day One.

-I didn’t get to see it myself, but a genuine Academy Award was at V’s school today.  INCEPTION won for Best Sound Mixing, and one of the three winners has a daughter in the other 2nd grade class.  V said the Oscar was about 2 feet tall and heavy.  The mom who brought it in said it’s already falling apart, which I find hilarious.

Like just about every other screenwriter out there, I like to daydream about winning Best Original Screenplay someday.

Don’t laugh.  It could happen.

Not a flux capacitor in sight

Maximum Z Black List, Looper, Oscars, screenwriting, scriptshadow, time travel

No LUCY update today because my computer decided to show me how often it could show off the phrase “Not responding.”  That and updating some of my software took mind-numbingly too long.

I’m also working an extended shift for the next few days, which allows me a little downtime to read some of my Black List scripts before I settle in at the producer’s desk.

Today’s selection: LOOPER, by Rian Johnson.  Johnson did the very-good BRICK and the never-saw-it THE BROTHERS BLOOM.

It’s not easy to write a decent time travel script. BACK TO THE FUTURE is still the standard.  STAR TREK IV made it a key plot point. I saw PRIMER, but didn’t care for it much. And all those years watching the original DOCTOR WHO taught me a thing or two.

LOOPER’s concept is pretty original, but the logline “In the present day, a group of hitmen are sent their victims from the future,” really falls flat.  This is about ONE hitman and his ‘victim’.  And the story focuses more on the aftermath of time travel, rather than the act itself.

After time travel is invented (about 30 years from now), it is outlawed, so only criminal organizations have access to the technology.  They get rid of their victims by sending them back in time, where an assassin, or “looper”, kills them and disposes of the body.

But if the bad guys in the future are caught, they get rid of all evidence connecting them to the past, and if the looper is still alive in the future, his older self is sent back and killed by his younger self.  Thus, the “loop” is closed.

The story focuses on Joe, a looper.  There’s a ton of voiceover exposition in the beginning, but I suppose it’s really necessary to explain how everything works.

We get a glimpse of his life for about the first ten pages, then things really get rolling.  That’s all I can really say, because although a lot of the writing is jaw-droppingly amazing, there were times I wasn’t sure exactly what was going on.  Every once in a while there’s a lot of jumping around in terms of events unfolding, or something that happens in the present having an immediate impact on the future (including a well-done but disturbing scene of a man’s future self slowly losing body parts.  Draw your own conclusions).

I may have to go back and read it again, just to see if there’s something I missed.

There was a plot payoff I should have seen coming, but was too focused on trying to keep track of everything that was going on.  And one of the subplots didn’t seem to serve much purpose.

I suspect what appears on the screen may not match what’s on the page.  The writing is that good; almost poetic in some places.

According to Scriptshadow: “I have not read this but I know many who have. They basically tell me that the first half is the greatest script ever written. And then a weird twist happens and the second half just can’t live up to the setup.”

I don’t know if I agree with that “greatest script ever written” claim, nor would I say the twist is necessarily weird.  This is a time travel movie; there are only so many potential twists to come up with.  I also enjoyed the second half, partially due to the dual storylines that eventually converge.

I will say that the ending really caught me by surprise.  It was unexpected, and also worked that time travel aspect very nicely.

If anybody else has read this, I’m curious to know what you thought.

This started production in January with a tentative 2012 release date, but nothing more specific than that.

-Post-Oscar commentary. I liked Anne, was disappointed with Franco.  Somebody tweeted that he looked like he lost a bet.  I’d agree with that.

I thought there was a time limit on acceptance speeches.  Some of them went WAY TOO LONG. I’m looking at you, Amidala.

Sandra Bullock and Kevin Spacey would make great co-hosts.  That Billy Crystal/Bob Hope thing was pointless.  Sad to see what’s happened to Kirk Douglas, but glad he’s able to take part despite being 95 years old.

Of all the Best Picture nominees, I’ve only seen INCEPTION and TOY STORY 3, but will work on seeing the rest soon. Definitely TRUE GRIT and SOCIAL NETWORK, leaning towards THE KING’S SPEECH and WINTER’S BONE, maybe for THE FIGHTER and 127 HOURS.  Still not sure about BLACK SWAN and THE KIDS ARE ALL RIGHT.

I’d also really like to see THE ILLUSIONIST and the rest of the Animated Short nominees (since DAY & NIGHT played with TS3).  I’ll also check out Live Action Short winner GOD OF LOVE, since the wild-haired director said it was on iTunes (also liked his speech a lot).

And did anybody notice Jack Nicholson wasn’t there?  Did anybody care?

I excel at multitasking

Maximum Z Lucy Steele, outlines, screenwriting, zombies

(I wrote this on Saturday, but didn’t get to edit it until Sunday.  Apologies for the delay.  Since I haven’t seen a lot of the nominated films, I won’t have an Oscar post, but do plan on watching the ceremony.)

I did the midday traffic shift yesterday, which gave me the opportunity to work on LUCY. Some of my most productive days are when I can work between reports.

I wanted to streamline the current section, which is basically everything after the midpoint. I also wanted to see if I could fit in my Irishman subplot a little sooner, resulting in payoff either by page 75, or into the final quarter of Act 2.

I was able to cut 3 scenes, for a tentative total of 24. If that seems high, keep in mind that more than a few are less than a page long. I have a tendency to overwrite during the outline phase. I throw it all out there: action, dialogue and a lot of notes to myself (Why does she do this?, what happens next?, expand!, etc)

A member of my old writing group once asked how I was going to get everything I had in the outline onto the page. I see the outline as a guide with nothing written in stone. And if I think a scene is too long, I’ll edit it down until I think it works.

My goal for this week is to get past the page 75 twist. Fingers crossed.

Movie of the Moment: K is a huge fan of zombie flicks. For those unaware, she grew up near Monroeville, PA, where the mall is from the original DAWN OF THE DEAD. She even has a Monroeville Zombies t-shirt from Kevin Smith’s company.

We watched the French horror THE HORDE, courtesy of Netflix. It has a great premise: a team of cops go into a gangster’s high-rise hideout to exact revenge for a fallen colleague. Then the building is attacked by zombies. Both sides team up to get out alive.

It was…okay.  Generous helpings of overacting, angry acting, repetitive dialogue and too-fast editing. I was under the impression there was lots of gore, but there wasn’t (at least for me). I was more squeamish when one guy kept slamming a zombie’s head against a cement post. That was due more to the sound effects than the visual.

They never really explain how the zombies came to be, but there are some mysterious explosions off in the distance soon after the beginning. Our theory was it was some kind of virus bomb-detonation thing.

I enjoy a good zombie flick, but there really seems to be an overabundance of them lately. We need a new genre!

Go Into The Story wrote earlier this week about the sale of ZOMBIE PET SHOP, which would be animated and family-friendly. Seriously? Wouldn’t it be easier to just make a new batch of SCOOBY DOO episodes?