rewrite

Fine-toothed comb at the ready!

Maximum Z editing, manager, rewrite, screenwriting, script, story, writing ,
This and a red pen are all I need
This and a red pen are all I need

Two weeks and just under six additional pages later, my initial pass at the managerial-dictated rewrite is complete.

Current page total: 120. Not too bad, but I’d like to trim that a little bit.

Now the next step: read through the whole thing, seeking out any more potential changes/fixes.

Most of the notes were incorporated, or at least a variation on what was suggested.  It’s too soon to tell what the overall impact is. I’ll know more after I read it.

I was originally concerned that adding a few lines here and there might become problematic. Am I making things too complicated?  Extending them unnecessarily?

Fortunately, my internal editor was more than ready to step in and stop me from going too far.  All that work of learning how to say more with fewer words seems to have really paid off.

In fact, in some cases, coming up with that little extra something actually helped to flesh out the characters and the story.

So while the next couple of days will be all about fine-tuning and further editing, the ongoing concerns of “Will it be what the manager is hoping for?” and “Is it better than it was?” will still be bouncing around somewhere in the back of my mind.

But second-guessing myself or stressing out over little details is counter-productive, especially if I want to be professional about this. I’ve made the commitment to see this through.  I’ll do what I can and polish it to the best of my ability, and that’s all there is to it.

Then it’s on to the next fun activity: slaying the dragon that is the 1-page synopsis.

Just a few more things to squeeze in

Maximum Z feedback, loglines, manager, rewrite, running, screenwriting, script, synopsis, writing
Plenty of room to work with!
Plenty of room to work with!

-The rewrite continues. I’ve checked a few items off the list, but there are still some more that need my attention. I think it goes without saying that hopefully my manager will become even more confident in the script.

I’d love to speed through it all and just be done with it, but that’s probably the worst thing I could do. This is not something to rush, and I have to keep reminding myself of that. It’ll get done the right way.

-I’d also sent them my logline and 1-page synopsis for some further tinkering. The logline is apparently still a work in progress. They liked the 1-pager, but I’ve been asked to see what I can do to make it stronger, which includes incorporating more of the “mystery and whimsy so prevalent in the script.”

Going for the silver lining angle, I’m seeing this as an opportunity to really go all out and play up the sheer adventurousness of the whole thing.  Time to let out my inner pulp novelist.

-I received feedback on the script from a well-known screenwriting guru. I hold his opinion in very high regard.

But if you took out all of his flowery speech about the writing process, the cliches and assorted material you just know he’s used on many others many times before, you’d be left with just a few sentences of constructive advice.

But he liked it, which is nice.

-A few months ago, I had the good fortune to connect with Barri Evans.  She’s been very supportive, so the least I can do is plug her upcoming seminar in Emeryville (across the Bay, next to Berkeley, home of Pixar). She does them all over the country, but this one’s local. I won’t be able to attend, but if you can and want to make some good progress with your writing, it’s definitely something you should consider.  Sorry –  no discount for mentioning me or this blog, although that would be pretty cool.

-Just a few words about yesterday’s tragedy at the Boston Marathon. As someone who takes part in these kinds of races, and has seen my family waiting for me at the finish line, this hit me especially hard.  I can’t imagine the pain and suffering of the victims, and can only hope that something like it never happens again.

Fear of such a tragedy will probably always be somewhere on the minds of runners of future races, but the best we can do is stay strong and keep running.

How much is too much?

Maximum Z backstory, Monty Python, Percy Jackson, rewrite, screenwriting, script, story, writing , , ,
A scene could be wafer-thin but still be potentially harmful
This slightly expository scene is practically wafer-thin. What harm could it do?

The rewrite continues, with some of the suggested changes being implemented.

Some, not all.

I take each suggestion into heavy consideration.  First and foremost – will it make the story better?

There’s no argument about some of them. They work, and that’s it.

There are the ones that are “maybe”. Purely optional.

Fortunately, there aren’t any that are straight-out “no”.

It’s the ones that suggest going into more detail (tell us more about this world you’ve created, explain why a character acts like they do, etc.) that are giving me pause.

I understand the reasoning behind this, but my concern is putting in too much information that it bogs down the whole thing. I’m as much for explaining things as much as the next writer, but I don’t want to overdo it.

I’d much rather leave a little to the audience’s imagination, rather than bombarding them with why things are happening.

Think of it this way: the flux capacitor makes time travel possible. Do you need to know how it works?

I suspect my subconscious creativeness let it’s two cents be known by coming up with a wonderfully bad joke to explain something. My initial response is to take it out, but it may actually be just what the scene needs.

-Movie of the Moment – The trailer for the next Percy Jackson movie came out earlier this week (hitting theatres in August), so now V is splitting her time between reading the book it’s based on and watching PERCY JACKSON AND THE LIGHTNING THIEF (2010) again.

I don’t have anything against the movie. It’s adequate popcorn fare with excessive CG (which this kind of story couldn’t be told without), and V likes it.  The more I think about it, the whole franchise just feels like a semi-successful attempt to be the next Harry Potter.

We also checked out the trailer for PACIFIC RIM, which has growing potential to be a family outing to our local theatre this summer.

Subtle tweaks

Maximum Z manager, representation, rewrite, screenwriting, script, story, writing , ,
I would totally use this
I would totally use this

Had a really good phone call with my manager and his assistant yesterday (still getting used to being able to say that) about what changes need to be made to the script before it’s ready to go out.

Fortunately, there aren’t that many.

Most of them are small details that will add a little depth to the story and flesh out some of the characters. Looking over the notes doesn’t make it seem like it’ll be too big to tackle.

It’s always nice to hear somebody be as enthusiastic about your work as you feel when you’re working on it. A little validation goes a long way.

I was really impressed with Chris the assistant’s knowledge about crafting a script and what makes for a good story.  He definitely knows his stuff.  It didn’t hurt that he seemed especially interested in some of my other story ideas.

So for now the focus is on the rewrite. The first draft of the western is on hold (54 pages as of yesterday), and the podcast gets pushed back again.

It’s highly doubtful all my potential script meetings/discussions in the future will go this smoothly, but it was definitely a great way to start.

I did it (part 1)

Maximum Z Black List, manager, pie, representation, rewrite, screenwriting, writing
Pretty self-explanatory, I hope
Pretty self-explanatory, I hope

You can no longer consider me a screenwriter without representation.

I signed with a manager this week: Sean Butler of The Mikael Group.

He found DREAMSHIP on The Black List and liked it enough to want to work with me on it.  The enthusiastic comments from his coverage person were also a nice little ego boost.

(Fortunately, his suggestions about changes to the script all are pretty minor and shouldn’t make a rewrite too difficult.  We’ll be discussing those next week.)

Simply put, it feels really good to have all that hard work finally pay off.

But this is a short-term celebration.  I’ve overcome the first hurdle of getting a career going (hence the “(part 1)”), and there’s still a lot more to go.

Next up – getting an agent.

I’d also like to offer an extremely hearty thanks to all of you who’ve been so generous with your time and feedback on this script. I really could not have gotten here without you, so enjoy a piece of pie of the flavor of your choice with my compliments.