rewrite

The writing gods are testing me. Again.

Maximum Z freelancing, jobs, rewrite, screenwriting, writing gigs

I got an email from the person who had me ‘rewrite’ their script last month.

They want to know if I could look at the latest draft and ‘make any necessary changes,’ but ‘without drastically changing the direction of the story.’

Now, I’m always up for a good project, but the last I saw, this script really needed a lot of work.  Basically, a page one rewrite was in order.

That was a month ago, so I don’t know how much progress, if any, has been made on subsequent drafts. I’m happy to help out, but if I see that none of my suggestions have been implemented, I may have to be a little more harsh in my critiquing.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not suggesting I’m the end-all and be-all when it comes to screenwriting.  I just think I have a pretty firm grasp on the basics, or at least a little more than some.

Such as knowing who the main character is supposed to be.  Things like that.

Just to be on the safe side, I sent them the plot point breakdown sheet I always use. Hopefully they’ll apply it to their script with positive results.

It’ll be interesting to see how this works out.

The only downside to helping somebody else is less time for my own stuff.  I haven’t been able to do anything on DREAMSHIP in at least a week, maybe more, and it’s driving me crazy.

But I’m not scheduled to work any extra hours this week, which gives me some more time to work on their script and mine.  But I’m also in the process of lining up some freelance (non-script) writing projects, so that also takes away from working on my stuff.

Somehow, I will work my way through all of this and come out triumphant (and possibly well-compensated).  At least, that’s what I’m hoping for.

No Movie of the Moment. I’ve been too frikkin’ busy.

Re-charged

Maximum Z Dreamship, Francois Ozon, French, Movie of the Moment, rewrite, screenwriting, Sylvain Chomet, The Triplets of Belleville

It’s been a busy couple of days.  School’s out. It was Memorial Day weekend. I’ve been working a lot of extra hours.

Moving ahead with the rewrite has been slower than I had hoped, but it’s coming along.  I got to the halfway point yesterday, so I’m still working on being completely done just before the annual trek to the in-laws in late June.

In some ways, the rewrite has been really cathartic.  Changing or completely cutting something I had previously thought untouchable feels so…liberating.  I’m no longer hindered by second-guessing myself, and now feel like I can really make this thing work.

Even better, story ideas or subplot points I thought would be necessary have been easily removed, thereby streamlining the overall story. I like when I can do that.  Having good writing days does wonders for the self-esteem and confidence levels.

I had a great time writing DREAMSHIP the first time around, and am fortunate enough to have recaptured that feeling for the rewrite.  At least so far.

-Movie of the Moment.  A double bill of French.

Since we watched THE ILLUSIONIST last week, we followed it up with THE TRIPLETS OF BELLEVILLE, also by Sylvain Chomet.  Highly recommended.

The second film, viewed only by myself, was RICKY, written and directed by Francois Ozon, who was also responsible for SWIMMING POOL and UNDER THE SAND.

The story about a working-class single mom who has a fling with a co-worker, resulting in a baby boy who for some inexplicable reason, grows a pair of working bird-like wings.  At times heart-breaking (especially from the perspective of her daughter, who craves her mother’s love), and with a lot less comedy and light-hearted moments than I was led to believe (which makes it definitely French in nature), overall, just kind of okay.

Location, location, location!

Maximum Z Dreamship, Jacques Tati, Oscars, rewrite, screenwriting, The Illusionist, The King's Speech, Whip It

I can’t explain it, but I think trying to work/write in a traditional setting is counterproductive.

When I do the midday traffic reports and am firmly planted in the studio, I’m practically gushing with creativity.  Sitting in the bleachers at the ice rink while V has hockey practice, I can get past a scene that’s been bothering me for a few days.  Today while V had her dentist’s appointment, and I’m sitting in the parental waiting area, I came up with a sequence that perfectly fits into my first ten pages.

When I sit anywhere inside our place, such as at the desk or at the dining room table, I get nothing. Zilch. Nada. A big fat goose egg.

Which leads me back to my opening line.

I’m going to have to figure out the best way to take advantage of this newfound enlightenment.  I can’t afford to hang out in a coffee shop, even if I get tea, so that’s out.  San Francisco has a bit of a homeless problem, so sitting on a public or park bench is also not a great choice.

There are two public libraries nearby, and finding an empty seat or table is usually pretty easy, so those are maybes.

But with the weather turning nicer, I keep returning to one spot that may be ideal.  Our place has a very small deck off the dining room.  About 5 by 12, with very high frosted glass walls.  If it’s a nice day, I can step outside, plop myself down in a lawn chair and see what happens.

Definitely an experiment worth trying.

-Movie of the Moment: A triple-header today.

Finished THE KING’S SPEECH. Since I have to see a few more Best Picture nominees, I can’t compare it to them, but I enjoyed it.  I was expecting something a little more complex, but there were only a handful of characters and a minimal number of settings; it seemed much more play-like.

I can see why Colin Firth and Geoffrey Rush were both nominated; each gave a phenomenal performance.  Their scenes were a joy to watch.

Movie #2 was WHIP IT, the roller derby movie directed by first-timer Drew Barrymore.  I loved it.  I thought it was a blast.  Some of the storylines and characters may be a little cliched, but the sum is definitely greater than the parts.  Just a lot of fun.

Movie #3 was THE ILLUSIONIST, the third of last year’s three nominees for Best Animated Feature (the other two being TOY STORY 3 and HOW TO TRAIN YOUR DRAGON). This was done by Sylvain Chomet, the brains behind THE TRIPLETS OF BELLEVILLE and based on a script by Jacques Tati; the title character is even drawn to look and act like Tati.  The wonderful but incredibly sad story of an unremarkable stage magician fading into obscurity as TV and rock & roll gain in popularity.

I read a couple of reviews that say the young woman who follows him from a small Scottish village to Edinburgh believes that his magic is real, but I didn’t catch that.  I thought she saw him as a fascinating man living a life of adventure, and wanted to tag along.

For the most part, this really is a silent picture.  There are some snippets of dialogue in English and French, but the storytelling is all done visually, and quite beautifully at that.

Don’t go into this thinking it’s a film for kids, ’cause it ain’t.  Nothing bad happens, but *SPOILER* it’s not easy to explain why the magician has to let his rabbit go into the wild, or why the ventriloquist’s dummy  is marked down to ‘free’ in the pawn shop window.

If you watch this, prepare to have your heartstrings given a good solid tug.

Oh so close

Maximum Z Dreamship, James Cameron, rewrite, screenwriting

I haven’t posted in a few days because I’ve been in ‘focused writer’ mode, concentrating on getting through Act Three.

And after much thought and consideration, I’m happy to say that for the most part, it’s done.  (Insert cheers and applause here)

There are still some little things to take care of, such as handling the notes to myself like “Work on this,” “Expand!”, or “How about/What if…”, as well as fleshing out some scenes here and there, but I don’t expect that to be too hard.  I’m hoping to get something workable out of it by this time next week.  Fingers crossed.

It was also nice to give the whole thing a quick read-through.  It moves a little quicker than the previous version.  And parts I thought would be hard to take out weren’t really missed at all.  I guess that’s the benefit of the streamlining process.

No set deadline for finishing, which may actually be helping me make this kind of progress.

-No actual Movie of the Moment, but we started watching THE KING’S SPEECH. Really like it so far.  I also can’t help but think of Helena Bonham Carter when she did the upper class voice in WALLACE & GROMIT’S CURSE OF THE WERE-RABBIT.

I caught some snippets of TERMINATOR 2: JUDGEMENT DAY on AMC.  It’s easy to forget what a great writer Cameron can be.  It’s definitely one of those movies you can watch from any point and be entertained.

I’ve never read the scripts, but I suspect this and ALIENS are good blueprints for how to properly put an action movie together.  Couldn’t hurt to at least use them as examples.

Something to keep in mind for this and when I start back up on LUCY.

Taking care of this and that

Maximum Z rewrite, screenwriting, Tron: Legacy

It was a busy weekend, what with the 100th running of Bay to Breakers. I ran/walked with V, who was quite the trouper.  Time: 1:57:49. Not too bad.

Suffice to say, I didn’t get to do much with the rewrite.  Just a little development around the end of Act Two and working into Act Three.

Although I did come up with two possible significant developments.

First – slightly changing the rules of how this world works.  I’d been very stubborn in trying to come up with something different I liked, not that I wasn’t trying.  But I think I may have found a solution that works for me and for the story.  I’ll have to see if it fits.  Sure hope so.

Second – I forget where I read it, but the article was about how a mentor character usually has to be gotten rid of in order for the hero to show growth.  As much as I hate to say it, I think I know which character is going to have to kick the bucket.  Which is a shame, because I really like this character a lot.  But they go down fighting – literally, and for a very good reason. Oh well.

Movie of the Moment: TRON: LEGACY. Man, what a disappointment.  I can see why it bombed.  It was a great concept – updating the ‘inside the computer world’ for the modern digital age, but oh-so-poorly executed! Why couldn’t they have spent as much time on the script as they did on making it look good?  A quick check of imdb shows that this had FOUR writers on the story, two of which did the screenplay.  Four?  Four guys and it still sucked?

And don’t get me started on this whole ‘computerized Jeff Bridges face to look younger’ thing.  That was awful AND distracting.

There were just way too many plotholes and inconsistencies to make it really work. What was stopping Clu from finding where Flynn was hiding?  What was stopping him from getting to that outgoing message-beam-thingy?  Where did all of his soldiers come from?  I thought Sam was changed by that laser cannon thing in Flynn’s office into digital information, so then why was he bleeding on the Grid?  How the hell did Quorra become real when they got out of there?  How did Flynn know that Rinzler was really Tron? How did Tron survive getting killed by Clu?  Why didn’t they ever show his face (probably blew the budget on youth-ifying Bridges, so they couldn’t afford to do Boxleitner as well)?  I really thought the snotty ENCOM guy in the boardroom was going to play an important role, but was just in that one scene.

These are just some of the things I was thinking while watching this.  Once again, too much hype, and a big fat fail on the execution. I suspect this will not become the cult classic the first one was.  While that had its fair share of story problems, at least it wasn’t on the same level as this.

Did I mention the cg was good?  Probably the only good thing about it.